Where is my stuff?

Here is a paper I had to write for my English class last year.  This semester I will be writing more, and I will continue to post.  At least then I might just have 12 posts... !

Where is my Stuff?

I am 42.  I don’t think I am losing it too terribly bad.  But one of the biggest problems in my  house is all the things that go missing.  Missing…  My house is clean.  I am not the most organized person in the world, but I know where I leave my things.  They all have their place. I am pretty sure that most things don’t sprout legs and walk away.  They have help, pretty sure. 

            I am the proud mother of 6 awesome children.  They all make me happy. They are smart, funny, and pretty clever.  In my spare time (and theirs) we love to talk.  My husband and I think the day each of them was born was the best day of our lives.  I love them so much that I even will buy them things.  Occasionally, I will allow them to borrow my things.  A moms heart always softens when the “I have nothing to wear” card gets pulled.  I stress to them the importance of returning said items. They promise. Profusely.  It doesn’t matter that it might be my favorite dress.  As soon as that said card is pulled, I forget that it will disappear.  And in order to find it, a massive hide and go seek game will follow.  Oops, my bad.  

            Actually, is it my bad?  No.  No it isn’t.  I have stated this before, and don’t mind restating, I am a clean person, and while my house isn’t Martha Stewarts, I know where I put my things. I hang things up.  I fold things.  So the other day, my daughter borrowed my running shorts.  Where are they now? She says, “Oh I returned them to you.”  Ok, so where are they?  I think in my mind.  Did I put them in my drawer? Nope, not there.  Did I put them in my closet with my pajamas?  Nope, not there either.  Did I put them under my bed?  Hahaha.   Still missing…   I may not be 20 anymore, but 42 isn’t that far from it, right? Am I losing it?  I always try to give them the benefit of the doubt.  But how long must I wait for my things to “walk” back into my life?  Oh, they will reappear, probably when she finds them under her bed.  All of a sudden they will be in my drawer as though they were there all the time.  

            I have tape for gift wrapping.  I bought lots of pens and pencils at the beginning of the school year for school work, and, you know, other stuff.  How is it that when I need to wrap a present, and write a card there is no tape and pen to be found?  I can show you the receipt, evidence of the purchase. I would even be willing to use a pencil at this point, but, no the drawer is empty. And no one knows where they might be found, because no one has used them!  How does the school work get done without pens and pencils?  I know… I have very clever children who use charcoaled wood to finish assignments, and rubber bands to attach school projects together.  Should I be proud of their cleverness? They are amazing. I’ll be the first to admit it. But come on, that clever? When I am expected to use the clever effects to wrap a wedding gift, and write a card, it ends!

            This is why I have to ask: is 42 a time when a mom starts to lose it? I read an article the other day about a mom that lost it in the presence of her daughter over a pair of finger nail clippers.  The daughter didn’t understand why she was acting so crazy.  Boy, she may not understand, but we parents sure do.  All I can say, is someday she will.  Someday, when she is a 42 year old mother, and wonders if she is losing it, the rude awakening answer to that question will come screaming in her face.  YES!  You are insane, you have children.